मराठी बाणा (Marathi Bana)

Got a chance to watch मराठी बाणा (Marathi Baana), a cultural orchestra by Mr. Ashok Hande of Chaurang group. It was one of the best live performances I have ever seen. Every thing seems to be perfect in terms of production, lights, execution. A team of around 125 people perform with sheer perfection and coordination. Its a fast track show and always keeps you interested in the show.



The singing and dancing performances are excelling. No margin of error . Very enthusiastic. The performers are not doing for the sake of doing it. Every one puts his/her 100% and feels like they are part of that moment and this gives an altogether different smile on the face of the audience.

The show covers how Marathi people celebrated festivals/functions like Diwali, New Years (Gudhi Padawa), Dahi Handi, Marriage etc. The drunk man (बेवडा ) in the marriage is excellent. The way he is handled during the marriage is amazing. Those who have seen how the drunk people behave and are handled especially in villages during such functions, can appreciate it ( I have see it ;) ). Also, if there are 50 performers on the stage, each one will have his/her role at every instance and you need to watch all of them. Every detail is taken care of. And thats what makes it an excellent performance.

The show covers most of the cultural aspects of Marathi junta. The history and geography is well covered. But I feel they have missed out on the cultural aspects of entire Maharashtra. Its mostly Mumbai-Pune-Konkan region based. No attempt to touch Marathwada, Vidarbha etc. Powada is also surprisingly missing in the play.

Language is no bar for this orchestra. Any non-marathi person can also enjoy it. Infact we had one Bong person with us and she liked it very much. Its more of an experience to watch the show than describing it here. I got 100 times more satisfaction than what I expected and guarantee that the same will happen with you also.

Lust

Lust is any intense desire or craving for self gratification and excitement (wikipedia).

Lust is in general thought to be associated only with sex but thats a very limited viewpoint. The definition above is generic enough to include lot many things. So what all can be included in lust? Take a break off and think of all the incidences/things which make you crave for it, especially for your own gratification.

Is craving for Cigarette, Alcohol lust? Can anxiety of Tea/Coffee be considered as lust? Is wanting to talk with some one for long, day in - day out, be looked in as lust? Things will vary from person to person, but its important to be aware of them.

After understanding your short comings, its important to act on them. In this scenario, the simplest act that you need to perform is not to perform that act. This will need very high commitment from your side. In spite of you wanting to avoid the act, you will not be able to avoid it. Don't get dishearted. Try again. Some time down the line you will be able to have that commitment and the awareness to drop the cravings created within you. Experience it for yourself!

Add value in a Friendship

Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more humans (from wikipedia).

There are two keywords, co-operation and support, that form the core of the definition. Friendship is not just about staying together or spending time together. For a long term friendship the co-operation and the support of each other is a must.

If you look in the history of your friend circle, you will notice that your friends with whom you used to spend a lot of time are no longer your friends but those few, with whom you had spent very little time are still your long term friends. For some friends you just say a hello and move on, for others you want to talk, for at least a minute, even if you are in a hurry. What is the difference between these two categories of friends? What makes the second category so special to you?

If you look back, you will notice that you have that special connection with the second category of friends. This connection is due to your past experience when they have added some value to your life, to your discussion, to your happiness, to take you out of your misery, or some thing like that. At some point in your life they had contributed positively and hence knowingly or unknowingly you tend to feel that special connection with them.



And YES, you can be that special one for so many others. People will be looking forward to meeting you and get that warmth from you and feel happy about it. Your happiness will also be elevated as there is no better satisfaction than being instrument for other's happiness. To achieve this you will need that frame of mind where you are coming out of your own world, your own benefits and start thinking about others. How can you contribute to other's life. Every small action that you make should be with an attitude to help others, to make them happy, and to show them the right direction. Practice this for some time and you will understand the depth of the point discussed here.

Life is wonderful if you know how to live

God : Hello. Did you call me?

Me: Called you? No.. who is this?

God : This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.

Me: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am in the midst of something.

God : What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.

Me: Don't know. But I can't find free time. Life has become hectic. It's rush hour all the time.

God : Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results. Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.

Me: I understand. But I still can't figure out. By the way, I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.

God : Well I wanted to resolve your! fight for time, by giving you some clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you through the medium you are comfortable with.

Me: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?

God : Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

Me: why are we then constantly unhappy?

God : Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become your habit. That's why you are not happy.

Me: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?

God : Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

Me: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty. .

God : Pain is inevitable able, but suffering is optional.

Me: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?

God : Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don't suffer. With that experience their life become better not bitter.

Me: You mean to say such experience is useful?

God : Yes. In every terms, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.

Me: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why cant we be free from problems?

God : Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons (to) Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you! are free from problems.

Me: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don't know where we are heading..

God : If you look outside you will not know where you are heading.Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

Me: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do?

God : Success is a measure as decided by others. Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.

Me: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?

God : Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Always count your blessing, not what you are missing.

Me: What surprises you about people?

God : when they suffer they ask, "why me?" When they prosper, they never ask "Why me" Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Me: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here. I cant get the answer.

God : Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

Me: How can I get the best out of life?

God : Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

Me: One last question. Sometimes I feel my prayers are not answered.

God : There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

Me: Thank you for this wonderful chat.

God : Well. Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts and doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve not a problem to resolve. Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live. "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that took our breath away!

(I am not the author of this text. Its a forwarded mail, worth sharing.)

Getting Married? How to deal your parents

Some time back, Anjali (name changed) told me about her marriage proposal with a high rank govt. officer. The dowry demanded was about 12-15 lakhs. Anjali, a modern Indian girl was against this but her parents were in favor of dowry. The issue was not limited just to dowry but had gone beyond to the communication gap between Anjali and her parents. Anjali is very clear that she does not want to be a commodity object and was in no mode to listen to her parents. Her parents, who have seen many more rainy seasons than Anjali were not able to absorb this sudden shock and refused to re-think about the dowry issue. This lead to a situation where no one wants to listen to the other person and every one thinks and he/she is correct and what the other person is thinking is a real bullshit.

Some of the points I made during the discussion are noted here.

Anjali needs to understand few things

• Parents have always been in their social shell. They have lived always in an environment where dowry is accepted. So, no dowry is something which they can't imagine. They have a very high peer pressure also. So, give them some time to come out of it.
  
• Her parents are still working on 1970's technology in 2008. So, its difficult to adjust to new thoughts.
• After all they are your parents. Their objective is to see you happy. You also wan to be happy. So the destination is the same only only the paths are different. If you understand this, lot of issues/communication gap etc can be solved. The objective then becomes to convenience the parents to choose the path that you want. Most of the cases, it is thought that the destinations are different.
  

Although I talked about dowry here, the points raised are the same when ever it comes to arranged marriage of a girl. Especially when the girl is well learned, have her own opinions, wants to build her career, and demands equality. I have seen many such cases and I know its very difficult situation to be in, either as a child or as parents. There is a major communication failure that leads to one party finally giving up (and most of the times, the girl), and getting married to a person who she thinks is not at all a good match for her.

DOs and DON'T

• Be polite when ever you are talking with your parents on any issue. This is where many people go wrong. At the same time be clear and confident in what ever you say.
• Don't force your parents to accept your views. Put your views for their review. Ask them to think over it for some time and let you know. This may not get you any where but at least they will be of the opinion that you are respecting them.
  
• Make them feel that you are listening to their views also. Get some time to think and negate their views.
• Most of the time these conversation are done on phone. Avoid that. If possible, talk one to one. This is where your character will be tested. Go ahead, and take the challenge.
• After all this, you most probably will have to take a hard stand. Be skillful. Make them aware that they are still working on 1970's technology.
  
• Catch your close relatives who might be of your opinion and can tell this to your parents. Again don't say bad about your parents to them. Be sure, they are close to your parents than you. So they won't like you making any such comments. Just make them aware of the issue and request them to have a chat with your parents, preferably in your presence.
• If nothing works out, have the guts to take your independent decision, against your parents. For this, you will need to take control of your life and will have to be responsible for what ever happens in your life. If you are self reliable, doing this should not be a big problem. By this I mean, search your own partner and get happily married to him :)

Finally, I wish all the best to all the Anjalis who are going through similar cases. Be brave!